Monday, December 1, 2008

A Letter to the Head of Pixar

Doobie doobie doo.

Andrew Stanton
Mill Valley, CA

Dear Mr. Stanton,

What a pleasure to finally sort of meet you, sir! I've been a Pixar fan for many years and think your team has consistently captured the magic I see everyday in the eyes and hearts of all those innocent children. Kudos to you!

You know, I used to be a child. It's true! I used to make up all sorts of little fantasies. I remember I used to imagine I was part of an underground resistance group fighting an oppressive, totalitarian government that was always hot on my trail. My home base was the bathroom, and if I touched certain flowers on the wallpaper next to the toilet, I could bring up computer screens and weapons and bar the door from government bounty hunters chasing me. It really passed the time while I pooped.

Anyway, my imagination hasn't left me just yet, and I've recently spawned a wonderful character I think you might enjoy. His name is Lolli Oliver, and he's "the Ambassador of Fun." I included a drawing for you to base your 3-D modeling off of, but here's a little background: his body is a peach, and if children get hungry they can always eat him (he's pesticide-free). He has floppy dog ears and two antennae that allow him to fly when they pick up "love frequencies." I'm not sure about this concept, so you'll have to flesh it out yourself.
Other than that he's pretty normal, just a couple of Mickey Mouse gloves and a broom for a leg. I was thinking maybe he could be the star in your next movie, and the theme could be diversity. Like maybe there's a talking peach, and a talking dog and a talking broom, and they all hate each other until Lolli Oliver shows up and teaches them how to rock. It practically writes itself!

Please let me know if you like my concept, and maybe we can option this thing. I don't want to name drop, but I bet Harvey Weinstein would eat this up in a heartbeat. Don't get left in the cold!

Merrily,


The Correspondent

P.S. Please excuse the writing on my drawing, I accidentally scribbled my lunch order on it.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You know... I have a friend working on Ice Age 3 right now...maybe I could pass this concept along to her as well?


Oh and...Horseradish??!?! BLECH!

Tom said...

This is hilarious. This is absolutely hilarious. Lolli Oliver for the win.