Thursday, November 19, 2009

A Letter to an Anthropologist

Writing consistently is hard when job searching. A man can only spend so many hours in front of a computer screen before going insane.

Dr. Susan D. Blum
University of Notre Dame
Department of Anthropology
611 Flanner Hall
Notre Dame, IN 46556

Dear Dr. Blum,

While growing a beard the other day, an interesting question popped into my mind that I wanted to share with you. I have sought out your expertise because of your studies on plagiarism, which struck close to home for me. My Mother was a strict disciplinarian with a penchant for ironic punishments. Once, when she discovered I had copied the personal note in a Thank-You card from a National Geographic article, she decided to "plagiarise" my supper for a week by fetching it out of the dog bowl after Huggles had finished eating. It's not as bad as you think, though, we always fed Huggles one can of creamed corn a night.

Anyway, my question for you regards the comedians of ancient cultures. It occurred to me that there is nothing new under the sun, and that perhaps all the ancient civilizations that came before us joked about the same things we do today. For instance, do you believe that ancient Egyptian men joked that their spouses were always talking and shopping and basket-weaving? Even stranger, do you think ancient cultures had racial humor?

For instance, maybe all the Sioux got made fun of because they liked fat horses. "Oh my God, did you see that horse's butt? It's so big! It must belong to one of those Sioux warriors..." Or maybe the Potawatomi were always eating corn. Like, that was their thing. "Do you smell corn? Smells like a Potawatomi convention over here!" Well, listen, you get the picture, I don't want to offend anybody. Corn's one of my favorite foods, too, I ate a lot of it as a kid.

I know you're pretty busy with the holiday season coming up, but perhaps you can direct me to a paper or study on this subject. If not, hey, maybe you could publish one. I think it's a fascinating topic. Maybe you need a guest lecturer?

In a Great Speaking Voice,

The Correspondent

If you enjoyed this letter please share it by using the Share Button below.